No Show? No Problem ... Seriously?

March 2023

In the early stages of my coaching practice, when a potential client didn’t show up for a scheduled conversation, it really threw me off.

I made it mean all sorts of things about myself and them - not helpful things of course.

I would deem my day as unsuccessful - and if I was really tapping into my negative creativity . . .

* my business is unsuccessful . . .
* my life is unsuccessful . . .
* my [ insert anything ] is unsuccessful . . .

Maybe you have a similar sounding spiral of doom?

These days, I take a different approach to no shows and it makes all the difference.

The No-Show Game Plan

1. After 10 minutes, send the person a simple email.

Dear X,

We had a meeting scheduled for today.

I don't see you on Zoom. Is everything ok?

2. Wait an additional 10 minutes to see if they get on the call.

If they do - great - proceed and give them the gift of your compassion and understanding. Then light up their world with your coaching.

3. If they don’t, it’s a no-show. Skip the negative spirals because . . .

4. Life just gave you a bonus 90-minutes!

Yep! Just like that - time that used to not be available to you, suddenly is.

Can you see that? Can you see how amazing that is?

A magic time warp in your favor.

Don’t waste it in negativity.  

Ask yourself asap:

What am I going to do with this magic gift of time?

And then DO IT - whatever it is - with giddy glee and enthusiasm. 

This is what it means to be a time warrior. 

To more time warps in your favor,



1. But Mary, I hate it when people waste my time like that?

No one can waste your time but you. You are the only person in charge of your time. You waste time by complaining, by being upset, by creating stories about them, yourself, your business. Take the gift of the extra time. And do not waste a minute of that.

2. But Mary, what about people who are repeated no shows?

For the first no show, I give the person a pass. We are all human. It happens. I’ve done it.

If in our enrollment process, there is a second no show, it’s a great coaching opportunity and it starts in email. Direct the person to assess if now is the best time in their life for this work.

I usually write something like this ...

Dear X,

I appreciate you letting me know. And I understand these things happen.

I am willing to put more time on the calendar so we can continue our conversation.

But only if you are willing to give me your word that you will show up for the call. That you will make this time as important as a flight to catch.

If you aren't in a place where you can do that, that's ok. Now may not be the right time for us to talk.

Let me know either way.



And if they do decide to keep the call, you can, with permission, ask them if what occurred in scheduling with you occurs in other places in their life … and now you are off to the races in powerfully coaching on that. Nothing has been wasted!


3. How do I make people show up for these calls?

I don't know that you have that power.

But there are ways to strengthen their commitment before you meet.

After they confirm the date and time, you can write back a simple message to confirm and include something like:

Let me know you are all set on the above and I’ll see you soon.

if they don't respond, you can follow up to make sure they received it.

You can also send pre-work prior to the call. I usually do something like this ...

Great, we are all set for (date/time). Zoom link is below.

And before we meet, please take a moment to send me an unedited email filling me in on your life right now. You can share things such as what's working, where you feel stuck, challenged, or uncertain, what is really calling to you, and anything that is getting in the way. I find that having a few more details up front will help us have a rich conversation. Thank you in advance for taking a moment to do this.

4. So a no-show is really not a problem, Mary? Really?

Yep! 100% not a problem unless you make it a problem. So don't do that.

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